My run of 8 miles today was glorious. It started with me waking up at 4 am and trying for an hour and a half to talk myself out of going. I told myself I could go later, I could do it tomorrow, I need the rest. My brain was working fast to keep me awake trying to talk my body out of wanting to run in the crisp cool morning. Finally I made the decision "not to listen to myself anymore" and I put my feet on the floor and got up, had my cup of coffee and something to eat, read my book, and then got ready to run.
Once at the park I put on my gloves and covered my ears. It was chilly out but not too cold for shorts. I have a rule you know, anything above 38 is shorts and a short sleeve shirt covered with a long sleeve shirt, gloves, and something on my ears. I hit start and my Garmin and took off.
The sun was coming up with a vengeance, bright and pink. The reflection in the water was brilliant.
My legs felt smooth and light for the entire 8 miles. Only once did I have to stop for my usual potty stop. Other than that this run redeemed me from the horrible run I had on Monday.
During this glorious run I thought about how God has provided so much for us. And I wondered how anyone can really think that this was all just some big cosmic mistake rather than someone making it all happen. I don't know how they cannot see it for what it is, God's wonder, his work, his creativity.
And on I ran...into my thoughts.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Cold Weather Running
Cold weather has me frisky. I love the chilly weather. Running in the crisp cold dark mornings, through the local park all lit up with Griswald like display for Christmas. There really isn't anything better.
My knee is getting so much stronger and my running is getting better. I had forgotten how much I love to run.
My struggle now is remembering that I need to cross train. I need to swim and I need to do my strength training. I am struggling with this even though I know that if I don't I will be injured again. Cycling is out for the winter unless Santa brings me a trainer for my bike (fingers crossed).
Why are we so stubborn? Humans are silly beings. Well off to work...enjoy your day.
My knee is getting so much stronger and my running is getting better. I had forgotten how much I love to run.
My struggle now is remembering that I need to cross train. I need to swim and I need to do my strength training. I am struggling with this even though I know that if I don't I will be injured again. Cycling is out for the winter unless Santa brings me a trainer for my bike (fingers crossed).
Why are we so stubborn? Humans are silly beings. Well off to work...enjoy your day.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Family and Friends
This post won't be about running. Instead it's about friendship.
This weekend was our daughter's wedding. It was amazing and she was beautiful. Her new husband was pretty good looking too!
This is not the place to go into the details of the wedding and that is not my intent, but to say that day was hectic is a huge understatement. So much to be done starting at 10:30 in the morning to get the place decorated for the event. I thought that most of the day I would be worried and running around trying to get things done and would simply run out of time.
And there they were, my family and friends. I won't go into detail because it really doesn't do justice. What I will say is that friends who we rarely see now that we've moved showed up early to help set up, fix the bridesmaids and brides hair, and stayed late into the night to help clean up. Family who really have better thing to do were there to take over when it was time for me to play hostess.
Friends from college made their way to this wedding and it seemed like we were at a reunion, dancing, laughing, and catching up. And they too stayed to help us at the end.
When all was said and done what impressed me the most is that they were there for us. We all meet people early in our adult lives, people who at the time share common interests with us. Work, or kids activities, or a neighborhood. Slowly those people become friends years go by and things change. People leave to work elsewhere, kids activities change, we move to different cities and different careers, and yet in this time of celebration they were there for us. All of us together.
We laughed, we cried, we drank, we toasted. Sharing stories from college and then from our young married years. We danced alongside Taryn and her friends who are just now entering their young married years. We all know as we sit and watch what it will be like in their future with their young friends. And we all pray that like us they will all stay together and be able to enjoy the weddings of their children together. Good friends for the rest of our lives.
This weekend was our daughter's wedding. It was amazing and she was beautiful. Her new husband was pretty good looking too!
This is not the place to go into the details of the wedding and that is not my intent, but to say that day was hectic is a huge understatement. So much to be done starting at 10:30 in the morning to get the place decorated for the event. I thought that most of the day I would be worried and running around trying to get things done and would simply run out of time.
And there they were, my family and friends. I won't go into detail because it really doesn't do justice. What I will say is that friends who we rarely see now that we've moved showed up early to help set up, fix the bridesmaids and brides hair, and stayed late into the night to help clean up. Family who really have better thing to do were there to take over when it was time for me to play hostess.
Friends from college made their way to this wedding and it seemed like we were at a reunion, dancing, laughing, and catching up. And they too stayed to help us at the end.
When all was said and done what impressed me the most is that they were there for us. We all meet people early in our adult lives, people who at the time share common interests with us. Work, or kids activities, or a neighborhood. Slowly those people become friends years go by and things change. People leave to work elsewhere, kids activities change, we move to different cities and different careers, and yet in this time of celebration they were there for us. All of us together.
We laughed, we cried, we drank, we toasted. Sharing stories from college and then from our young married years. We danced alongside Taryn and her friends who are just now entering their young married years. We all know as we sit and watch what it will be like in their future with their young friends. And we all pray that like us they will all stay together and be able to enjoy the weddings of their children together. Good friends for the rest of our lives.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Rising Early
Does anyone really like getting up at 4:15 am for any reason, let alone working your butt off in some form of exercise?
When my phone alarm goes off a nice song begins to play. I hear it before it gets too far in and immediately throw my feet on the floor. I don't lay there and lament over having to get up, it's just too easy to talk myself into not going at all. So I get up as soon as I hear the song start to play.
At first I am in somewhat of a daze, getting dressed without any real thought. (This is why I lay my clothes out the night before). I stumble to the kitchen to get a little bite to eat, a banana, an apple, maybe an Ezekiel English muffin. Drink some water to get me going. Terry's alarm goes off 15 minutes after mine and he lounges in bed grumbling. I just let him grumble.
Once he is up and moving we get ready and head off for the morning's endeavor. On a 4:15 day that would be Boot Camp. A fitness group with a fearless leader who drinks espresso before she gets to the gym at 4:45. Needless to say moving like that this early is tough but also invigorating. On the off days we run instead and get to sleep until 5:00 am. Yippee!
The best part of these mornings is the time we have together after the hard work. Opening the door to the coffee brewing, the house filled with that yummy aroma, we poor a cup and sit together discussing what we expect from our day, how we felt about our workout, and how much we would love to go back to bed. It's uninterrupted time. Sometimes we sit on the deck in the dark watching the kittens eat, listening to the frogs who are just waking up, and wondering what kind of critters we hear moving in the trees.
These times together are priceless. Yes that term is overused but how else do you describe the feeling of sharing an early morning with someone you have loved for 29 years?
It really doesn't get any better than this.
When my phone alarm goes off a nice song begins to play. I hear it before it gets too far in and immediately throw my feet on the floor. I don't lay there and lament over having to get up, it's just too easy to talk myself into not going at all. So I get up as soon as I hear the song start to play.
At first I am in somewhat of a daze, getting dressed without any real thought. (This is why I lay my clothes out the night before). I stumble to the kitchen to get a little bite to eat, a banana, an apple, maybe an Ezekiel English muffin. Drink some water to get me going. Terry's alarm goes off 15 minutes after mine and he lounges in bed grumbling. I just let him grumble.
Once he is up and moving we get ready and head off for the morning's endeavor. On a 4:15 day that would be Boot Camp. A fitness group with a fearless leader who drinks espresso before she gets to the gym at 4:45. Needless to say moving like that this early is tough but also invigorating. On the off days we run instead and get to sleep until 5:00 am. Yippee!
The best part of these mornings is the time we have together after the hard work. Opening the door to the coffee brewing, the house filled with that yummy aroma, we poor a cup and sit together discussing what we expect from our day, how we felt about our workout, and how much we would love to go back to bed. It's uninterrupted time. Sometimes we sit on the deck in the dark watching the kittens eat, listening to the frogs who are just waking up, and wondering what kind of critters we hear moving in the trees.
These times together are priceless. Yes that term is overused but how else do you describe the feeling of sharing an early morning with someone you have loved for 29 years?
It really doesn't get any better than this.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Slow Going
It's been a weak since I really started "running" again. I'm really only jogging but don't tell anyone.
It's hard coming back from an injury, hard on your ego, as well as the injured limb.
However, what I've discovered once again is the beauty of running so early that you can see all the stars, hear the crickets, and see the sun rise.
Getting up at 4:15 and going to boot camp at 5:00 is great too, in it's own way. During boot camp you are inside pushing yourself to the limit. You have to depend upon the others around you and the music to keep you going through the "harder than I thought this was going to be" workouts.
Running? Well that's a different push. No matter where you are starting from it's an activity that makes you reach deep down inside, pulling every reserve to go where you need to go, alone. And that is true when recovering, starting out, or training for a time goal. It's a much more individual soulful activity.
I am happy to be on the mend, happy to be able to walk/jog/run/cycle/swim/yoga, whatever the days plan calls for. I am happy and thankful to be healthy.
It's hard coming back from an injury, hard on your ego, as well as the injured limb.
However, what I've discovered once again is the beauty of running so early that you can see all the stars, hear the crickets, and see the sun rise.
Getting up at 4:15 and going to boot camp at 5:00 is great too, in it's own way. During boot camp you are inside pushing yourself to the limit. You have to depend upon the others around you and the music to keep you going through the "harder than I thought this was going to be" workouts.
Running? Well that's a different push. No matter where you are starting from it's an activity that makes you reach deep down inside, pulling every reserve to go where you need to go, alone. And that is true when recovering, starting out, or training for a time goal. It's a much more individual soulful activity.
I am happy to be on the mend, happy to be able to walk/jog/run/cycle/swim/yoga, whatever the days plan calls for. I am happy and thankful to be healthy.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Back on the Road
The time is finally here, time to get back on the road and work my way up to my 5th marathon on July 2011.
I have learned so much during this time off, I've learned that I can enjoy other sports, I've learned that patience is more important than we realize, and I've learned that when I whine it's OK for my husband to tell me to cut it out.
Starting back is a bit scary and yet exciting. For awhile I'll be going at it slowly while still participating in a fitness boot camp, cycling, and swimming. Therefore I am staying fit and this should go along way to getting me strong for number 5.
I look forward to watching the progression and sharing that time with Terry and friends.
I have learned so much during this time off, I've learned that I can enjoy other sports, I've learned that patience is more important than we realize, and I've learned that when I whine it's OK for my husband to tell me to cut it out.
Starting back is a bit scary and yet exciting. For awhile I'll be going at it slowly while still participating in a fitness boot camp, cycling, and swimming. Therefore I am staying fit and this should go along way to getting me strong for number 5.
I look forward to watching the progression and sharing that time with Terry and friends.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Long Time No Post
Wow, it's been FOREVER since I posted a blog. I've really let this slip since my surgery. Oh well, nothing much going on. Here's a recap:
- Fitness Bootcamp in the mornings M,T,TH
- Cycling once or twice a week 20-25 miles no large steep hills (cause of knee)
- Swimming once or twice a week
- Walking two to three times a week anywhere from 3 - 6 miles
Work has really been busy and I've been out of town, that really messes up my schedule some but that's life and it will get better.
Today I start rebuilding my running. I am not going to lie I am a bit nervous about starting back, and I will start slow, so slow...walk/run, walk/run...sigh...soon it will come back I know, but time goes so slow.
I can't do boot camp at the same time. Too much stress on my knee. I hate that because I feel like I am gaining so much strength in bootcamp. At some point I can add that back in, I just have to be patient.
Patient, Patient, Patient...ok got it...my new mantra!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Recuperating
Yep, that's the word of the day...recuperating. And that is what I am doing. It's not easy but it's what we all must do from time to time when injury gets in the way of our way of life.
Interestingly enough I was telling a friend today that some time off isn't going to hurt her, in fact it might help her be stronger...why can't I tell myself that and really believe it? I know it's true but it doesn't matter, I just can't sit still to recover.
So I am trying, tomorrow I can swim again and I'm thrilled to be able to do something that is a good cardio workout! And in a week I'll be cycling and then in a few weeks running again.
This time next year I won't have to even think about this...at least that's my hope!
Interestingly enough I was telling a friend today that some time off isn't going to hurt her, in fact it might help her be stronger...why can't I tell myself that and really believe it? I know it's true but it doesn't matter, I just can't sit still to recover.
So I am trying, tomorrow I can swim again and I'm thrilled to be able to do something that is a good cardio workout! And in a week I'll be cycling and then in a few weeks running again.
This time next year I won't have to even think about this...at least that's my hope!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Knee Surgery
I have not posted much about my knee surgery because I really didn't want to be a whiner. So today I will catch you up in case you've missed my ongoing saga.
Two and a half years ago I tore my meniscus, got an MRI, went to an orthopedic surgeon, he said I didn't need surgery. OK so days go by.
I keep training and run the San Antonio Marathon in tears because my knee hurts so bad. But time goes on and I continue to run and eventually have to lay off a month in which time I start swimming and doing yoga.
Eventually I go back to running and do well, but off and on I have periods of time where my knee really bothers me and I have to back off.
Fast forward to this last winter, I trained, did well, got a Personal Record in the half marathon, I was so excited! And then BOOM the knee again. Thinking overuse, I followed my coaches advice and backed off, but when I started up again it didn't get better and then I had this catching that would happen even when I was sleeping, or walking around the house, or mowing.
Finally my coach strongly suggested I go to the doctor and get an MRI which I did and sure enough it needed to be cleaned out, and of course I have arthritis which I already knew. The ortho doctor recommended scoping it and so I agreed.
Ten days ago I went in and had the surgery. No big deal at all. I spent two days doing nothing but taking pain pills (although I never had any pain) so the third day I quit taking them. Only used the crutches for one trip from the car to the couch...after that I never touched them except to put them in the closet.
Fourth day I walk a mile, next day 2, then three...so on Thursday a week after the surgery I go to the Y and use the elliptical and the bike each for 30 minutes, thinking I would get a good workout only to find that it hurt if I did it too hard, it's all about rebuilding not doing a full workout...SIGH...so I took it down and just got through it. Yes it drove me crazy.
Friday I took off and Saturday I walked 5 miles at a brisk pace and then came home and cleaned house. By the time I cleaned house my knee was tired and twinging so I iced and rested. Sunday we went out and kayaked, easy day for the legs.
That brings us to today. The nurse comes in and is surprised my knee is not more swollen, takes out my stitches and asks me if it's bothered me at all, when I relay my activities to her she looks surprised and simply says well, that is good! Then the doctor comes in, checks the incisions, checks flexibility, says he is amazed it is not swollen.
Then he shows me the pictures that they took while scoping. WOW, lots of stuff going on in there. They smoothed out the meniscus, sawed on some bone to help the arthritis and took out this little band of tissue that was rubbing on my thigh bone.
He asked me about my activity to this point, if it hurt at any point and once again I relayed the information. He just smiled and laughed when I got to the 5 miles and then cleaning the house day. And then as he started to tell me that he saw no reason for rehab, you can do this and that, I took out a list I had prepared with questions about all the activities I wanted to continue doing.
At that point he laughed and shook his head, all in a very nice and complimentary way. And he answered concisely each question and said "you will pay the next day if you overdo". I get the point!
As we left I apologized for being so pesky with my questions and he answered that it was no problem at all, he enjoys patients like me who want to be active.
I am left wondering what other people do? Use this as an excuse to do nothing?
Two and a half years ago I tore my meniscus, got an MRI, went to an orthopedic surgeon, he said I didn't need surgery. OK so days go by.
I keep training and run the San Antonio Marathon in tears because my knee hurts so bad. But time goes on and I continue to run and eventually have to lay off a month in which time I start swimming and doing yoga.
Eventually I go back to running and do well, but off and on I have periods of time where my knee really bothers me and I have to back off.
Fast forward to this last winter, I trained, did well, got a Personal Record in the half marathon, I was so excited! And then BOOM the knee again. Thinking overuse, I followed my coaches advice and backed off, but when I started up again it didn't get better and then I had this catching that would happen even when I was sleeping, or walking around the house, or mowing.
Finally my coach strongly suggested I go to the doctor and get an MRI which I did and sure enough it needed to be cleaned out, and of course I have arthritis which I already knew. The ortho doctor recommended scoping it and so I agreed.
Ten days ago I went in and had the surgery. No big deal at all. I spent two days doing nothing but taking pain pills (although I never had any pain) so the third day I quit taking them. Only used the crutches for one trip from the car to the couch...after that I never touched them except to put them in the closet.
Fourth day I walk a mile, next day 2, then three...so on Thursday a week after the surgery I go to the Y and use the elliptical and the bike each for 30 minutes, thinking I would get a good workout only to find that it hurt if I did it too hard, it's all about rebuilding not doing a full workout...SIGH...so I took it down and just got through it. Yes it drove me crazy.
Friday I took off and Saturday I walked 5 miles at a brisk pace and then came home and cleaned house. By the time I cleaned house my knee was tired and twinging so I iced and rested. Sunday we went out and kayaked, easy day for the legs.
That brings us to today. The nurse comes in and is surprised my knee is not more swollen, takes out my stitches and asks me if it's bothered me at all, when I relay my activities to her she looks surprised and simply says well, that is good! Then the doctor comes in, checks the incisions, checks flexibility, says he is amazed it is not swollen.
Then he shows me the pictures that they took while scoping. WOW, lots of stuff going on in there. They smoothed out the meniscus, sawed on some bone to help the arthritis and took out this little band of tissue that was rubbing on my thigh bone.
He asked me about my activity to this point, if it hurt at any point and once again I relayed the information. He just smiled and laughed when I got to the 5 miles and then cleaning the house day. And then as he started to tell me that he saw no reason for rehab, you can do this and that, I took out a list I had prepared with questions about all the activities I wanted to continue doing.
At that point he laughed and shook his head, all in a very nice and complimentary way. And he answered concisely each question and said "you will pay the next day if you overdo". I get the point!
As we left I apologized for being so pesky with my questions and he answered that it was no problem at all, he enjoys patients like me who want to be active.
I am left wondering what other people do? Use this as an excuse to do nothing?
Thursday, July 29, 2010
A Family Memory
A joyful thing happened in South Carolina, in addition to my son's wedding. I discovered once again how enjoyable it is to share a run with those you love and admire.
I have quite a few nieces who are becoming runners. Sometime back we discussed getting together in South Carolina while we were all there for the wedding and going for a run. I took the liberty of finding a good route that would provide us with a loop to stop for water and bathrooms. This happened to be my son's future in-laws neighborhood.
Saturday morning we rose early and drove over to park in their drive to begin our run. My brother joined us as well. All running different paces I showed them the route and we all took off on our adventure. It seems simple and uneventful, nothing really to write about, nothing is further from the truth!
Sharing a time with my family, who are now on a quest to be more healthy, who are there to share in our joy later in the evening, well it was more than just a "run" to me. As I think back on it I needed that run and that time to share with them more than they realize. They may have been there for reasons that have nothing to do with me but in the end they gave me a great gift. A gift of camaraderie, the gift of calm and joy in sharing my passion with them on a day when instead I could have been a bag of nerves.
This is one of those runs that will make my list of my best runs. Thank you all for making such a wonderful memory with me.
I have quite a few nieces who are becoming runners. Sometime back we discussed getting together in South Carolina while we were all there for the wedding and going for a run. I took the liberty of finding a good route that would provide us with a loop to stop for water and bathrooms. This happened to be my son's future in-laws neighborhood.
Saturday morning we rose early and drove over to park in their drive to begin our run. My brother joined us as well. All running different paces I showed them the route and we all took off on our adventure. It seems simple and uneventful, nothing really to write about, nothing is further from the truth!
Sharing a time with my family, who are now on a quest to be more healthy, who are there to share in our joy later in the evening, well it was more than just a "run" to me. As I think back on it I needed that run and that time to share with them more than they realize. They may have been there for reasons that have nothing to do with me but in the end they gave me a great gift. A gift of camaraderie, the gift of calm and joy in sharing my passion with them on a day when instead I could have been a bag of nerves.
This is one of those runs that will make my list of my best runs. Thank you all for making such a wonderful memory with me.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Swim team
I've now been officially told that I can move to lane 2! I started this swim team last year with a lot of fear, and no skill. I've now learned the basics and the fear is gone.
Through the winter season I will practice endurance and continue to practice my stroke mechanics and then for next summer I will be in lane 2.
This shows that no matter what the age you can improve, learn new things, and grow in many ways both physically and mentally.
It really is a wonderful feeling that can be carried to many areas of life. Putting yourself in an uncomfortable situation and getting through it is something that everyone should go through, it makes life easier to handle.
Through the winter season I will practice endurance and continue to practice my stroke mechanics and then for next summer I will be in lane 2.
This shows that no matter what the age you can improve, learn new things, and grow in many ways both physically and mentally.
It really is a wonderful feeling that can be carried to many areas of life. Putting yourself in an uncomfortable situation and getting through it is something that everyone should go through, it makes life easier to handle.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Relativity
Yesterday we ran the Freedom 5K here in Granbury and while I got 3rd in my age division my time was slow in comparison to what I've run in the past. Terry came in 2nd and likewise his time was slow in comparison to the past.
I was not going to run this 5K. I've not been running hard since Cowtown and I know I am not in race shape so my decision to run the 5K was to simply run it, not race it.
Then the race comes. I simply cannot just RUN in a race and I push, not hard enough, but still I push. And then when it's over I am upset with myself that I didn't train hard for the race. And yet it's all relative right? I've learned that for me it's best to train for specific races and then allow my body to rest and do some cross training. And so my PRs came in the spring. It was time to let my body recover and get ready for knee surgery so that I can run the Missoula Montana Marathon next July.
In the end getting 3rd place which used to be exciting and amazing to me, has become mundane when I KNOW I could win 1st if I really trained. And so my attitude must change. I can run, and I run a pretty good pace even when I am not in race shape and my knee is hurting and so it's all a matter of relativity.
And now I'm on to the next phase in my running/swimming/biking endeavors.
I was not going to run this 5K. I've not been running hard since Cowtown and I know I am not in race shape so my decision to run the 5K was to simply run it, not race it.
Then the race comes. I simply cannot just RUN in a race and I push, not hard enough, but still I push. And then when it's over I am upset with myself that I didn't train hard for the race. And yet it's all relative right? I've learned that for me it's best to train for specific races and then allow my body to rest and do some cross training. And so my PRs came in the spring. It was time to let my body recover and get ready for knee surgery so that I can run the Missoula Montana Marathon next July.
In the end getting 3rd place which used to be exciting and amazing to me, has become mundane when I KNOW I could win 1st if I really trained. And so my attitude must change. I can run, and I run a pretty good pace even when I am not in race shape and my knee is hurting and so it's all a matter of relativity.
And now I'm on to the next phase in my running/swimming/biking endeavors.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Behind on Blogging!
I've learned so much over the past couple of years in regard to excersize, it's hard to know how to begin to share what I have learned but I shall give it a try.
1. Running with no cross training will eventually lead to injury
2. Cross training is fun and I've learned that swimming (and I mean REALLY swimming), learning all of the strokes, doing tough drills, and sprints, plus distance swimming, has helped me in a number of ways. I've also learned I really won't drown if I push hard swimming!
3. Cycling is very hard, much harder than running in my opinion. But also very rewarding and exhilerating.
4. Yoga/Pilates provide a very tough but cleansing workout while allowing me to gain strength I never got with lifting weights.
5. Most of all though I've come to the realization that all of these activities (and others) have become such a way of life that they are no longer just "workouts".
When we begin working out we have to plan and think about when we will get our workouts in, it becomes a hassle to make sure we get just enough time in to counter our calorie intake. While it is positive and we enjoy it, it is "exersize".
No longer do I feel this way, these activites are a way of life, they are what I do, just like brushing my teeth, doing my hair, eating. It's just the way we live and with it comes freedom.
In a few weeks I have knee surgery, nothing major, I am worried about how I will fill my time while not being able to fully live they way I have become accustomed. I guess I will just have to work hard to get myself back better than ever!
Last I want to express how exciting it has been to see family members beginning the quest for health, and you know who you are! Congratulations and know that I am here to support you in any way I can. Looking forward to a "family" half sometime in the future!
1. Running with no cross training will eventually lead to injury
2. Cross training is fun and I've learned that swimming (and I mean REALLY swimming), learning all of the strokes, doing tough drills, and sprints, plus distance swimming, has helped me in a number of ways. I've also learned I really won't drown if I push hard swimming!
3. Cycling is very hard, much harder than running in my opinion. But also very rewarding and exhilerating.
4. Yoga/Pilates provide a very tough but cleansing workout while allowing me to gain strength I never got with lifting weights.
5. Most of all though I've come to the realization that all of these activities (and others) have become such a way of life that they are no longer just "workouts".
When we begin working out we have to plan and think about when we will get our workouts in, it becomes a hassle to make sure we get just enough time in to counter our calorie intake. While it is positive and we enjoy it, it is "exersize".
No longer do I feel this way, these activites are a way of life, they are what I do, just like brushing my teeth, doing my hair, eating. It's just the way we live and with it comes freedom.
In a few weeks I have knee surgery, nothing major, I am worried about how I will fill my time while not being able to fully live they way I have become accustomed. I guess I will just have to work hard to get myself back better than ever!
Last I want to express how exciting it has been to see family members beginning the quest for health, and you know who you are! Congratulations and know that I am here to support you in any way I can. Looking forward to a "family" half sometime in the future!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
A Week of Reflection
Have you ever had something happen, or maybe many somethings, all close to the same time that cause you to reflect on life, love, happiness, success and what that means to us?
This week one of our dogs had to be put down. This dog was one we rescued from the pound when we lived in Abilene. They did not realize she was pregnant, soon after her rescue we had 12 puppies. She was well trained and loved everyone. Her life with us was fun, we gave her all our love. In the end she was sick and there wasn't anything more we could do.
This week a woman I knew in Abilene, an avid cyclist, was killed while riding. A horrible tragedy that still has me wondering if I am ready should something happen. Have I done all I want to do, given enough, loved enough, been wise enough, made the right choices more often than not?
This week our son moved to South Carolina after graduating from UT. He is off to another life, far enough away that we can't drive to him easily. He will be getting married a couple of months, he will be responsible for his own family then. And I ponder whether or not he will find success as he defines it, I hope they don't go through so many of the hard times we went through and yet I know they have to in order to grow together.
It's been a week to think about life, the meaning behind why we are here. These are the things I think about while I'm running. It's easy for me to zone out and just think about all that is happening and my place in everything around me. Thank goodness I have running to help me sort out my own reflection.
This week one of our dogs had to be put down. This dog was one we rescued from the pound when we lived in Abilene. They did not realize she was pregnant, soon after her rescue we had 12 puppies. She was well trained and loved everyone. Her life with us was fun, we gave her all our love. In the end she was sick and there wasn't anything more we could do.
This week a woman I knew in Abilene, an avid cyclist, was killed while riding. A horrible tragedy that still has me wondering if I am ready should something happen. Have I done all I want to do, given enough, loved enough, been wise enough, made the right choices more often than not?
This week our son moved to South Carolina after graduating from UT. He is off to another life, far enough away that we can't drive to him easily. He will be getting married a couple of months, he will be responsible for his own family then. And I ponder whether or not he will find success as he defines it, I hope they don't go through so many of the hard times we went through and yet I know they have to in order to grow together.
It's been a week to think about life, the meaning behind why we are here. These are the things I think about while I'm running. It's easy for me to zone out and just think about all that is happening and my place in everything around me. Thank goodness I have running to help me sort out my own reflection.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Kroger Loves Me!
As some of you know I have started a new activity (for me) called cycling. Those who do this often make it seem easy, they ride along effortlessly, smoothly, looking fluent and one with the road.
Believe me it's not that easy. At least not for me. Running and cycling are very different, from what I've gathered thus far there are those who are good runners and those who are good cyclists and most folks are not good at both, or like both at the same level.
I am enjoying learning to cycle. It is such a different experience and there is so much to learn and get used to. For example:
The bottom part of the handlebars, the part that curves toward you, are called drops. The first time someone told me to use my drops I thought they were telling me it was time to put drops in my eyes! There are lots of little terms like that, all part of the learning experience.
There are a few things that are difficult for me to get used to. Such as, you ride on the RIGHT side of the road. Sounds silly I know but I am so used to running on the left that I find myself going to the left on my bike when I really need to stay on the right.
The most difficult thing for me is looking back over my left shoulder to see if there is a car coming. Keeping the handle bars from turning when you are looking over your shoulder is impossible! I am afraid I will go right into the ditch or hit a tree or something. Therefore I rely on others to tell me if a car is coming or I stop and look...I keep hearing this will be easier as I get used to it...yeah right!
And let's not forget the seat...when the heck do your bones get used to that bumping up and down on that seat? Again people say "oh you will get used to it", OK ... so WHEN????
My last experience though was the one that thus far wins the prize. I went out for a ride with some friends who are training for several triathlons...yes they are she beasts... no doubt. It should have been an easy 30 mile ride. The most I had ridden before this ride was 18. No problem, I think to myself. We begin to ride, it's great at first and then we begin climbing hills, everywhere we went was an incline. Not to mention the wind was at 20 mph in our face! REALLY? Why did I do this. One thing I am not comfortable with is drinking water while riding and so I just didn't drink until we took a break. A little too late for that. At 80 degrees and humidity above 60% drinking and eating are important. I ate at noon but didn't ride until 3:30.
Because I run so much I know when to fuel and when it's OK not to, it's different in cycling and it's something I was not ready for. I simply did not prepare.
Even before half way I had no water left. The girls were sweet enough to give me water but it was too late I was already dehydrated. At mile 25 we went by the Kroger so that I could get a banana and some more water. I tried to eat, tried to drink but I felt pretty bad and although there were only a few miles left I simply could not go on. But before my friends could hit the road and leave me to get a ride home I got sick.
Yes, I threw up 4 or 5 times right in front of Kroger with people going in and out to buy groceries...there I was hurling chunks of banana. Needless to say I was very dehydrated. Lesson learned, I will be more prepared on my next longer ride!
They went on while one of the husbands came to pick me up and take me to my car.
Do I still like cycling you may be asking? Heck yeah! I can't wait to go out with them again, this time better prepared for the long haul.
Believe me it's not that easy. At least not for me. Running and cycling are very different, from what I've gathered thus far there are those who are good runners and those who are good cyclists and most folks are not good at both, or like both at the same level.
I am enjoying learning to cycle. It is such a different experience and there is so much to learn and get used to. For example:
The bottom part of the handlebars, the part that curves toward you, are called drops. The first time someone told me to use my drops I thought they were telling me it was time to put drops in my eyes! There are lots of little terms like that, all part of the learning experience.
There are a few things that are difficult for me to get used to. Such as, you ride on the RIGHT side of the road. Sounds silly I know but I am so used to running on the left that I find myself going to the left on my bike when I really need to stay on the right.
The most difficult thing for me is looking back over my left shoulder to see if there is a car coming. Keeping the handle bars from turning when you are looking over your shoulder is impossible! I am afraid I will go right into the ditch or hit a tree or something. Therefore I rely on others to tell me if a car is coming or I stop and look...I keep hearing this will be easier as I get used to it...yeah right!
And let's not forget the seat...when the heck do your bones get used to that bumping up and down on that seat? Again people say "oh you will get used to it", OK ... so WHEN????
My last experience though was the one that thus far wins the prize. I went out for a ride with some friends who are training for several triathlons...yes they are she beasts... no doubt. It should have been an easy 30 mile ride. The most I had ridden before this ride was 18. No problem, I think to myself. We begin to ride, it's great at first and then we begin climbing hills, everywhere we went was an incline. Not to mention the wind was at 20 mph in our face! REALLY? Why did I do this. One thing I am not comfortable with is drinking water while riding and so I just didn't drink until we took a break. A little too late for that. At 80 degrees and humidity above 60% drinking and eating are important. I ate at noon but didn't ride until 3:30.
Because I run so much I know when to fuel and when it's OK not to, it's different in cycling and it's something I was not ready for. I simply did not prepare.
Even before half way I had no water left. The girls were sweet enough to give me water but it was too late I was already dehydrated. At mile 25 we went by the Kroger so that I could get a banana and some more water. I tried to eat, tried to drink but I felt pretty bad and although there were only a few miles left I simply could not go on. But before my friends could hit the road and leave me to get a ride home I got sick.
Yes, I threw up 4 or 5 times right in front of Kroger with people going in and out to buy groceries...there I was hurling chunks of banana. Needless to say I was very dehydrated. Lesson learned, I will be more prepared on my next longer ride!
They went on while one of the husbands came to pick me up and take me to my car.
Do I still like cycling you may be asking? Heck yeah! I can't wait to go out with them again, this time better prepared for the long haul.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Spring
We've had a lot of rain this year and this spring the eyes see green grass, green trees, colorful wildflowers everywhere, yards and gardens coming to life. Spring is such a rebirth for Mother Earth as well as for all of us, a time to begin anew.
On my ride the other day, the one with the really big hills, I was in awe of the wildflowers. So many colors everywhere you look, God is so amazing in his palette I never cease to be amazed.
The only downside is that my knee is really not well after Cowtown Half and so I am once again struggling to recover. Running is something I am doing less of now. But never fear I am going to an orthopedist here next week and hope soon to be back on my running feet. In the meantime I am walking, cycling, swimming, yogaing (is that a word?), working in the yard, fishing, so as you see I am still very active. It's only the running that seems to bother me...sigh.
However, walking does have some advantages. I've noticed that when I'm walking I tend to see things happening around me more than when I am running. An example follows.
A transition to spring is baseball. Everyone knows this, even those who don't keep up with sports. The local little league teams play close to the walking/bike/running path. It is funny how seeing those little boys out there playing, the brothers and sisters running around and lining up at the concession stand, or playing wallball on the side of the buildings, brings a warm feeling that starts deep down in my heart and builds up to my face where then a smile cannot be suppressed.
Yesterday on the path near the fields was this little boy, maybe 5 or 6, playing a game with his shadow. Jumping up and down trying to throw the shadow off. He would turn and look, jump up, spin around, as if trying desperately to separate himself from the shadow but when he could not he would giggle that little kid giggle that is so contagious. This is the way it should be I thought to myself. Kids need this, the outdoors, the imaginative spirit. Forget the video games, the TV, those things can squash our ability to imagine, to live, to play with our shadows. It was wonderful to see a child doing what children do naturally. Little does he know the affect he had on me.
We never know the affect we have on others. I hope that the affect I have is a positive one! Thank you kiddo for the shadow dance.
On my ride the other day, the one with the really big hills, I was in awe of the wildflowers. So many colors everywhere you look, God is so amazing in his palette I never cease to be amazed.
The only downside is that my knee is really not well after Cowtown Half and so I am once again struggling to recover. Running is something I am doing less of now. But never fear I am going to an orthopedist here next week and hope soon to be back on my running feet. In the meantime I am walking, cycling, swimming, yogaing (is that a word?), working in the yard, fishing, so as you see I am still very active. It's only the running that seems to bother me...sigh.
However, walking does have some advantages. I've noticed that when I'm walking I tend to see things happening around me more than when I am running. An example follows.
A transition to spring is baseball. Everyone knows this, even those who don't keep up with sports. The local little league teams play close to the walking/bike/running path. It is funny how seeing those little boys out there playing, the brothers and sisters running around and lining up at the concession stand, or playing wallball on the side of the buildings, brings a warm feeling that starts deep down in my heart and builds up to my face where then a smile cannot be suppressed.
Yesterday on the path near the fields was this little boy, maybe 5 or 6, playing a game with his shadow. Jumping up and down trying to throw the shadow off. He would turn and look, jump up, spin around, as if trying desperately to separate himself from the shadow but when he could not he would giggle that little kid giggle that is so contagious. This is the way it should be I thought to myself. Kids need this, the outdoors, the imaginative spirit. Forget the video games, the TV, those things can squash our ability to imagine, to live, to play with our shadows. It was wonderful to see a child doing what children do naturally. Little does he know the affect he had on me.
We never know the affect we have on others. I hope that the affect I have is a positive one! Thank you kiddo for the shadow dance.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
My Adorable Husband
As you can see this blog is not about running, at least not all about running. Reading through some of my blogs from the past I notice that I often leave out the one constant in my life, the one person who is always there for me, who puts up with me no matter what I do, who really really loves me for who I am and not who I think I need to be.
He does run with me, in fact he is the one that many times gets me out the door. He may not know this because it appears that it is the other way around, but knowing that he depends upon me to go run with him keeps me going. Not to mention I want to look good for this man as long as is possible and running is one of the ways I can do that!
So to you my adorable husband, thank you. Thank you for loving me, for helping me through difficult times, for sticking with me through difficult times, and for...well...just being there. I love you!
He does run with me, in fact he is the one that many times gets me out the door. He may not know this because it appears that it is the other way around, but knowing that he depends upon me to go run with him keeps me going. Not to mention I want to look good for this man as long as is possible and running is one of the ways I can do that!
So to you my adorable husband, thank you. Thank you for loving me, for helping me through difficult times, for sticking with me through difficult times, and for...well...just being there. I love you!
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Release
Every runner understands how the activity we love is also our way of letting go of those emotions we pent up inside. I imagine anyone who participates in an individual athletic endeavor feels that release as the endorphins take over during our effort.
If you read my blog from April 6 you know that I am struggling with the emotions of an alcoholic family member. If you are are in, or have been in, this situation yourself you understand how horrible it is to see a family member or friend throw their lives away while you watch helplessly without understanding why they are pushing us all away. We've tried to help and yet it's not been successful and now we are told it's time for us to step away. In some ways it's easier to walk away in other ways it's more difficult. In either case it's very sad and confusing.
While many people lose sleep when they are worried or upset, I tend to sleep hard. Sometimes I wonder if it's a form of depression. Last night was one of those nights. The last few weeks have been horrible and yet I've been fortunate to have the distraction of wedding planning and work so that I've been able to really turn the worry over to God. At some point though it caught up to me and last night I found myself exhausted. I slept so hard and more hours than really needed. I woke up to a cloudy gloomy day and only felt more weary.
I planned on running 5 miles today and yet here I sat on the couch wanting to go back to sleep. My experience with running is that even when you don't want to, if you just go out the door and start the experience soon you will be in a different place in your head. That place where your fear and worries ooze out through your pores, the sweat taking them away from your heart and your brain and dumping the toxin into the air where they evaporate into oblivion.
And so we made our way out the door and off to our run. At first it seemed difficult, legs heavy, but even before one mile was up I felt my stress began to leave, I felt my heart lighten. I prayed a conversation with God as I strode along and soon I felt the full release. It occurs to me that giving the credit to running is not accurate. The credit really goes to God who made our bodies to handle stress, emotion, and increase endorphins when we push enough to work out the toxic ideas and thoughts that seep through day in and day out.
The issue still exists, the family member is still in turmoil, I still have to sit and wait to see if he can pull himself out of this hell he has built and calls his life. Only now, after the prayer and run, I am able to focus on keeping MY family healthy. For that I am grateful to God.
If you read my blog from April 6 you know that I am struggling with the emotions of an alcoholic family member. If you are are in, or have been in, this situation yourself you understand how horrible it is to see a family member or friend throw their lives away while you watch helplessly without understanding why they are pushing us all away. We've tried to help and yet it's not been successful and now we are told it's time for us to step away. In some ways it's easier to walk away in other ways it's more difficult. In either case it's very sad and confusing.
While many people lose sleep when they are worried or upset, I tend to sleep hard. Sometimes I wonder if it's a form of depression. Last night was one of those nights. The last few weeks have been horrible and yet I've been fortunate to have the distraction of wedding planning and work so that I've been able to really turn the worry over to God. At some point though it caught up to me and last night I found myself exhausted. I slept so hard and more hours than really needed. I woke up to a cloudy gloomy day and only felt more weary.
I planned on running 5 miles today and yet here I sat on the couch wanting to go back to sleep. My experience with running is that even when you don't want to, if you just go out the door and start the experience soon you will be in a different place in your head. That place where your fear and worries ooze out through your pores, the sweat taking them away from your heart and your brain and dumping the toxin into the air where they evaporate into oblivion.
And so we made our way out the door and off to our run. At first it seemed difficult, legs heavy, but even before one mile was up I felt my stress began to leave, I felt my heart lighten. I prayed a conversation with God as I strode along and soon I felt the full release. It occurs to me that giving the credit to running is not accurate. The credit really goes to God who made our bodies to handle stress, emotion, and increase endorphins when we push enough to work out the toxic ideas and thoughts that seep through day in and day out.
The issue still exists, the family member is still in turmoil, I still have to sit and wait to see if he can pull himself out of this hell he has built and calls his life. Only now, after the prayer and run, I am able to focus on keeping MY family healthy. For that I am grateful to God.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Wounded Knee
Do you get tired of reading about my knee? I know I get tired of writing about it, that's for sure. Well here I am again. A couple of posts ago I talked about my knee and the frustration with it. I'm still healing little by little.
This week I was able to run the Capital 10K on Sunday, then 5 on Tuesday and 5 on Friday. Will run 5 again on Sunday. So it is getting better, it's just time...blah blah blah, that's what they always say! In the meantime I am working on strengthening my quads with specific rehab exercises, cycling, and swimming. And the fun continues.
Today it is pouring rain...I took it easy and took a nice nap just listening to the rain on the tin roof. I feel like I am in the mountains only it is warmer. Nice day to just sit around.
Ok update done, I'm off to clean house :)
This week I was able to run the Capital 10K on Sunday, then 5 on Tuesday and 5 on Friday. Will run 5 again on Sunday. So it is getting better, it's just time...blah blah blah, that's what they always say! In the meantime I am working on strengthening my quads with specific rehab exercises, cycling, and swimming. And the fun continues.
Today it is pouring rain...I took it easy and took a nice nap just listening to the rain on the tin roof. I feel like I am in the mountains only it is warmer. Nice day to just sit around.
Ok update done, I'm off to clean house :)
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Sadness
Today I write about a painful subject, something that is hard to talk about, something I wonder if any of you share.
A close family member struggles with alcholism. After 5 years of sobriety a relapse occurred in October 2009. As a family we gathered together, spent a huge sum of money, and took this person to a top notch facility. Not really an intervention, as help was wanted, but with the understanding that this was the last shot for us, we cannot continue to spend the money for this kind of treatment over and over. Not to mention the emotional toll it has taken on our family.
The treatment went well and all seemed fine until the last two weeks and then we learned this weekend a devestating relapse occured. Now holed up in the condo drinking to a point beyond recognition of the person we know, we can not help. It must come from within and we must stay with our conviction of no more bailing out, now it is up to the alcholic to take action.
The alcholic is more likely to stay sober if they know they can lose those they love and so "tough love" is what seems to work. However, the risk is that before they get to that point they kill themselves either intentionally or by drinking so much their body shuts down. Do you know how hard it is to sit here knowing that this may be the next call we get?
I keep reminding myself that the 5 years of sobriety came from this person's conviction to stay sober, not with our help and so if the mind can get clear enough perhaps the same course will be taken. I have to remain positive, pray, and wonder how someone gets to this point. What is it in the psyche that drives someone to be so down on themselves that they cannot handle the world they live in? This person is a great runner, training for the first triathlon plus two marathons this year. I think perhaps being "driven" is a curse rather than a blessing and when something doesn't work into the course that they plan they simply cannot handle the disappointment.
I try to analyze, and yet it's something I can't figure out, something I cannot control. And so I pray, I hope for the best, and I send my love to the person I do not want to lose.
A close family member struggles with alcholism. After 5 years of sobriety a relapse occurred in October 2009. As a family we gathered together, spent a huge sum of money, and took this person to a top notch facility. Not really an intervention, as help was wanted, but with the understanding that this was the last shot for us, we cannot continue to spend the money for this kind of treatment over and over. Not to mention the emotional toll it has taken on our family.
The treatment went well and all seemed fine until the last two weeks and then we learned this weekend a devestating relapse occured. Now holed up in the condo drinking to a point beyond recognition of the person we know, we can not help. It must come from within and we must stay with our conviction of no more bailing out, now it is up to the alcholic to take action.
The alcholic is more likely to stay sober if they know they can lose those they love and so "tough love" is what seems to work. However, the risk is that before they get to that point they kill themselves either intentionally or by drinking so much their body shuts down. Do you know how hard it is to sit here knowing that this may be the next call we get?
I keep reminding myself that the 5 years of sobriety came from this person's conviction to stay sober, not with our help and so if the mind can get clear enough perhaps the same course will be taken. I have to remain positive, pray, and wonder how someone gets to this point. What is it in the psyche that drives someone to be so down on themselves that they cannot handle the world they live in? This person is a great runner, training for the first triathlon plus two marathons this year. I think perhaps being "driven" is a curse rather than a blessing and when something doesn't work into the course that they plan they simply cannot handle the disappointment.
I try to analyze, and yet it's something I can't figure out, something I cannot control. And so I pray, I hope for the best, and I send my love to the person I do not want to lose.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Beginning Something New
I have taken the plunge, I've committed money to something new, I've decided to go ahead and start cycling. Today I bought a new road bike, helmet, gloves, clothes, spare tube, pump, etc... needless to say it's a lot of money dropped, now I must make the investment a worthwhile one.
I took a picture of the bike and emailed to to my kids. Both responded with an invitation to do a ride with them. Worth the investment? I do believe so :)!
I took a picture of the bike and emailed to to my kids. Both responded with an invitation to do a ride with them. Worth the investment? I do believe so :)!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Injury Frustration
If you are an athlete you understand the frustration you feel when you have a nagging injury.
Athletes, whether young or old, elite or amateur, all have in common this innate need to drive their bodies to do the most it can do regardless of whether or not injury my occur. Once injury occurs the difficulty in doing what is needed in order to get well and stay well is enormous. And as my coach says it "it is always an experiment of one".
If you've followed my blog for any time you know that 3 years ago I tore my meniscus. This has translated into arthritis in my left knee and so any time I do anything different with running such as increasing speed too fast, changing surfaces too much, more hills than usual, my knee acts up.
Such is the case at this time. After getting a personal best time at the Cowtown Half Marathon my knee is once again "acting up". This does not mean re injury it simply means that it's reacting to something different and my coach and I must figure out what that "difference" is and put that in our stash of "what not to do next time" so that in the future we will eliminate the stressor. The Cowtown Half Marathon is extremely hilly, but I trained on hills. My pace was fast but I trained for a fast pace. There are 2 - 2.5 miles downhill on brick streets in this race. The surface is hard, uneven and unrelenting.
The change in the surface on a long downhill at a fast pace tells the coach and my doctor that this is the trigger to the knee inflammation. Sigh...frustration.
Now comes the part that is so difficult. Rest, rebuild, rest, rebuild...I get so tired of this cycle. And yet it is what must be done and so this is where I am with running. It is indeed a love/hate relationship.
Athletes, whether young or old, elite or amateur, all have in common this innate need to drive their bodies to do the most it can do regardless of whether or not injury my occur. Once injury occurs the difficulty in doing what is needed in order to get well and stay well is enormous. And as my coach says it "it is always an experiment of one".
If you've followed my blog for any time you know that 3 years ago I tore my meniscus. This has translated into arthritis in my left knee and so any time I do anything different with running such as increasing speed too fast, changing surfaces too much, more hills than usual, my knee acts up.
Such is the case at this time. After getting a personal best time at the Cowtown Half Marathon my knee is once again "acting up". This does not mean re injury it simply means that it's reacting to something different and my coach and I must figure out what that "difference" is and put that in our stash of "what not to do next time" so that in the future we will eliminate the stressor. The Cowtown Half Marathon is extremely hilly, but I trained on hills. My pace was fast but I trained for a fast pace. There are 2 - 2.5 miles downhill on brick streets in this race. The surface is hard, uneven and unrelenting.
The change in the surface on a long downhill at a fast pace tells the coach and my doctor that this is the trigger to the knee inflammation. Sigh...frustration.
Now comes the part that is so difficult. Rest, rebuild, rest, rebuild...I get so tired of this cycle. And yet it is what must be done and so this is where I am with running. It is indeed a love/hate relationship.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Inspiration
There are times in each of our lives when we cross paths with someone who, even in a casual conversation says something that inspires you to be a better person. Inspires you to think about your life in a different way.
Famous writers and better writers than I have written about inspiration, about war, about those who fight for our freedom. It's not a new topic, we hear about it every day on the news. And yet if you are like me it fades in and out of your realm of understanding. I don't keep up with the political issues, I get angry when people don't support those who are fighting for us in Iraq, but it doesn't really have meaning on a day to day basis.
Yesterday after my swim workout as I was getting dressed a woman in workout clothing comes out of the sauna. She sits down, red with heat, sweating. I move my things out of her way as she begins to speak.
Her son is in Iraq, he has been there for 6 months and seen things most of us will never see. She spends some time each day in the sauna praying, it is her way of honoring him. He is there where it is terribly hot and so the sauna is her way to connect to her son so that she can feel at least a bit of the heat he feels in the dessert. She is worried about him but more than that she is hurt by the people in our country who do not support the soldiers and what they are fighting for. Her son is there fighting so that others may have what we take for granted and yet people are so caullous they don't think before they speak and it breaks her heart.
This was a very short conversation and nothing I have not heard from others but this time, this woman, her words, and her prayers in the sauna, inspired me to think more about the freedoms I have and the pain she feels. I think about my own children who are her son's age. I miss them so much when they are at school, imagining them in Iraq fighting and not knowing for sure if they will come home...it's truly something I cannot comprehend.
I vow to think about this woman and her son when I decide to feel sorry for myself because of some little mishap in my life, I thank her for the inspiration she gave me, and I thank her son for fighting so that others may have a bit of what we have...I pray that he is returned home safe and sound.
Famous writers and better writers than I have written about inspiration, about war, about those who fight for our freedom. It's not a new topic, we hear about it every day on the news. And yet if you are like me it fades in and out of your realm of understanding. I don't keep up with the political issues, I get angry when people don't support those who are fighting for us in Iraq, but it doesn't really have meaning on a day to day basis.
Yesterday after my swim workout as I was getting dressed a woman in workout clothing comes out of the sauna. She sits down, red with heat, sweating. I move my things out of her way as she begins to speak.
Her son is in Iraq, he has been there for 6 months and seen things most of us will never see. She spends some time each day in the sauna praying, it is her way of honoring him. He is there where it is terribly hot and so the sauna is her way to connect to her son so that she can feel at least a bit of the heat he feels in the dessert. She is worried about him but more than that she is hurt by the people in our country who do not support the soldiers and what they are fighting for. Her son is there fighting so that others may have what we take for granted and yet people are so caullous they don't think before they speak and it breaks her heart.
This was a very short conversation and nothing I have not heard from others but this time, this woman, her words, and her prayers in the sauna, inspired me to think more about the freedoms I have and the pain she feels. I think about my own children who are her son's age. I miss them so much when they are at school, imagining them in Iraq fighting and not knowing for sure if they will come home...it's truly something I cannot comprehend.
I vow to think about this woman and her son when I decide to feel sorry for myself because of some little mishap in my life, I thank her for the inspiration she gave me, and I thank her son for fighting so that others may have a bit of what we have...I pray that he is returned home safe and sound.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
A New Personal Best
Since the late summer, early fall, I've been training. Training for what? Well training to run without knee pain, training to run faster, training to increase endurance, and many other outcomes. There are many races we run in and most of them are larger so there is no way I am going to place in my division, there are just too many fast women out there, and that's ok because it's really all about improving myself. And improving doesn't always mean speed, it can also mean endurance, injury recovery, sanity...
We start with the Wurst 5 miler. A 5 mile race at Wurstfest in New Braunsfels Texas. Our times show we are definately faster.
Next we go to Vegas to run the Rock n Roll Half Marathon. It's the first year for the Rock n Roll series to have a race in Vegas. It was an exciting race and we did well with a 1:57. Terry and I ran it together and for the first time we actually ran the ENTIRE race together and finished at the same time. That made the race fun.
Then a month later we went to Austin to defend or better our 3rd place Mixed Masters Division title in the 3M Half Marathon relay. With Terry running 6.4 and me running the last 6.8, this year we came in second! So exciting. And our times show we have improved our times. Plus I am having no knee pain!
One month after 3M, just last weekend, we head down to Fort Worth to run the Cowtown Races. Cowtown conssists of a marathon, an ultra marathon, a half marathon, a 10K, and a 5K. I ran the half marathon and Terry in the 10K. These races are not easy. They are hilly and I mean VERY hilly and in the half marathon there are 2 to 2.5 miles downhill on brick streets. This is a very hard and uneven surface. It's tough to run on and tough on the body. Never the less the races are fun and exciting. Knowing how tough this course is my goal is just to break the 1:57 pace I seem to be stuck in. Last year at Cowtown I ran a 1:57:33. I would like to run a 1:56. As I start out I feel myself going into a faster pace than I really intended and I try to slow it down some but my body has other ideas. I realize now that my slower pace is really a faster pace as I've gotten stronger. However, it is most common for people to start out way to fast and then die at the end...I did NOT want that to happen. The race was hard but I found myself strong on the hills and was able to continue a good pace even going uphill. The downhill on bricks was really tough, it comes about mile 8 and it's mostly downhill which really pounds your legs. While my knee did not hurt my hips and hamstrings were crying out. And yet I kept pushing. There were a few times I really wanted to stop but I quickly pushed the negative talk out and kept going. At mile 10 I realized I was way ahead of pace, the question now was whether or not I would make it at this pace or faster, or crash. Mile 11 and 12 are uphill, not a fun place for uphill and while I continued to be strong mentally it was a challenge. And then I saw a friend, she usually beats me in races, I could see that she was moving slower than I and so my brain clicked and my pace picked up. The competativeness kicked in and from that point forward I pushed with everything I had. Coming down the last stretch into the finish I got that familiar "I'm gonna throw up" feeling which always means I am giving it my all. Luckly I held it together and got a new personal best of 1:53:23. I've not run a half marathon at that pace ever and the closest was in 2000 with a 1:54!
All of this to say, we may be getting older but there are things in life that age defys and on that day my age didn't matter. I still beat a time I never thought I would beat and I am thrilled.
However, now I realize that I've moved the bar, getting another personal best will be tough.
We start with the Wurst 5 miler. A 5 mile race at Wurstfest in New Braunsfels Texas. Our times show we are definately faster.
Next we go to Vegas to run the Rock n Roll Half Marathon. It's the first year for the Rock n Roll series to have a race in Vegas. It was an exciting race and we did well with a 1:57. Terry and I ran it together and for the first time we actually ran the ENTIRE race together and finished at the same time. That made the race fun.
Then a month later we went to Austin to defend or better our 3rd place Mixed Masters Division title in the 3M Half Marathon relay. With Terry running 6.4 and me running the last 6.8, this year we came in second! So exciting. And our times show we have improved our times. Plus I am having no knee pain!
One month after 3M, just last weekend, we head down to Fort Worth to run the Cowtown Races. Cowtown conssists of a marathon, an ultra marathon, a half marathon, a 10K, and a 5K. I ran the half marathon and Terry in the 10K. These races are not easy. They are hilly and I mean VERY hilly and in the half marathon there are 2 to 2.5 miles downhill on brick streets. This is a very hard and uneven surface. It's tough to run on and tough on the body. Never the less the races are fun and exciting. Knowing how tough this course is my goal is just to break the 1:57 pace I seem to be stuck in. Last year at Cowtown I ran a 1:57:33. I would like to run a 1:56. As I start out I feel myself going into a faster pace than I really intended and I try to slow it down some but my body has other ideas. I realize now that my slower pace is really a faster pace as I've gotten stronger. However, it is most common for people to start out way to fast and then die at the end...I did NOT want that to happen. The race was hard but I found myself strong on the hills and was able to continue a good pace even going uphill. The downhill on bricks was really tough, it comes about mile 8 and it's mostly downhill which really pounds your legs. While my knee did not hurt my hips and hamstrings were crying out. And yet I kept pushing. There were a few times I really wanted to stop but I quickly pushed the negative talk out and kept going. At mile 10 I realized I was way ahead of pace, the question now was whether or not I would make it at this pace or faster, or crash. Mile 11 and 12 are uphill, not a fun place for uphill and while I continued to be strong mentally it was a challenge. And then I saw a friend, she usually beats me in races, I could see that she was moving slower than I and so my brain clicked and my pace picked up. The competativeness kicked in and from that point forward I pushed with everything I had. Coming down the last stretch into the finish I got that familiar "I'm gonna throw up" feeling which always means I am giving it my all. Luckly I held it together and got a new personal best of 1:53:23. I've not run a half marathon at that pace ever and the closest was in 2000 with a 1:54!
All of this to say, we may be getting older but there are things in life that age defys and on that day my age didn't matter. I still beat a time I never thought I would beat and I am thrilled.
However, now I realize that I've moved the bar, getting another personal best will be tough.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Contrast
In contrast to last week at this time today is dry and glorious day. It is 48 now on it's way to 52 degrees, sunshine, no wind, a gorgeous day outside. One of those days that begs attention, begs for members of the earth to enjoy the great outdoors, there is just no way around it.
And so I ran. It's been awhile since we've seen the sun bright and shining, running with the sun on my face and yet the cool air circling my body I felt exhilerated. Even a tough run like today's felt somehow different, uplifting, as if things were changing. Could spring be on it's way or is this just a tease?
And so I ran. It's been awhile since we've seen the sun bright and shining, running with the sun on my face and yet the cool air circling my body I felt exhilerated. Even a tough run like today's felt somehow different, uplifting, as if things were changing. Could spring be on it's way or is this just a tease?
Snow Instead of Running
It's been awhile since I blogged. Not sure why, maybe because I need inspiration to blog, maybe I am just lazy, or maybe it's because I have no idea if anyone ever reads these postings! In any case here is a new one for anyone who dares to read it.
Last week we had snow, snow is not completely unheard of here in Granbury but 8 to 13 inches certainly is something people here don't see often if at all. Here in our little piece of the world we had 8 inches, but just to the east and north of us they had 12 to 13! It was enough to shut everything down for the most part and so a big fire in the fireplace helped to make the snowfall even nicer.
Growing up in the mountains this kind of snowfall is not unusual to me, and yet the memories it brought back from my childhood were simply glorious. Days of snow falling in big slow flakes, fire roaring in the fireplace, and our old wood stove, and a game of monopoly going. Quiet peaceful naps in front of the fire, snow forts with reinforcement of snowball ammunition inside laying in wait for the big fight coming later in the day, wet and muddy tile in the entry of the carport, gloves, hat, snow boots sitting by the fire getting dry, and yummy rich hot chocolate with lots of mini marshmellows on top. And interestingly enough I can even smell the wet dog (Ghosty) who slept there by us after an afternoon of romping with us in the snow.
Fingers stinging when warming up, nose red and runny, ears nipped with cold. And a big pot of stew on the stove filling the house with that comfort food smell.
What wonderful memories, I do miss the mountains, sometimes more than I can stand. Someday we will go back, someday when it's the right time, hopefully so that we can make some of those memories with family we have yet to know.
Last week we had snow, snow is not completely unheard of here in Granbury but 8 to 13 inches certainly is something people here don't see often if at all. Here in our little piece of the world we had 8 inches, but just to the east and north of us they had 12 to 13! It was enough to shut everything down for the most part and so a big fire in the fireplace helped to make the snowfall even nicer.
Growing up in the mountains this kind of snowfall is not unusual to me, and yet the memories it brought back from my childhood were simply glorious. Days of snow falling in big slow flakes, fire roaring in the fireplace, and our old wood stove, and a game of monopoly going. Quiet peaceful naps in front of the fire, snow forts with reinforcement of snowball ammunition inside laying in wait for the big fight coming later in the day, wet and muddy tile in the entry of the carport, gloves, hat, snow boots sitting by the fire getting dry, and yummy rich hot chocolate with lots of mini marshmellows on top. And interestingly enough I can even smell the wet dog (Ghosty) who slept there by us after an afternoon of romping with us in the snow.
Fingers stinging when warming up, nose red and runny, ears nipped with cold. And a big pot of stew on the stove filling the house with that comfort food smell.
What wonderful memories, I do miss the mountains, sometimes more than I can stand. Someday we will go back, someday when it's the right time, hopefully so that we can make some of those memories with family we have yet to know.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Walking the Dogs
I did run today, a wonderful easy 7 mile run. Enjoyed it tremendously. However this blog will not, from this point forward mention anything about my run. Instead I am going to focus on my walk with our dogs.
I've been trying to take the dogs out for a walk every day, rarely do I do it every day, but I am trying. They now understand that when I walk out to the yard with the leashes it is time to get some exercise and they are excited. I used to struggle to get the leash on them because they would not sit still long enough for me to get it clipped on their collar. But now they know they have to sit for me if they want to walk. You really can teach old dogs new tricks!
Today was a beautiful day, in the 60's, no wind, sunny and clear, perfect day for a walk with the dogs. We head out, as usual they are pulling me along in the beginning, noses to the ground, stopping to take care of bodily functions along the way. As we go along I talk to them (I know that's a shock), and it occurs to me how nice it would be to have someone to walk me so that I get exercise, someone to feed me just the right amount of food with the right nutrients, someone to give me my vitamins and other medications just exactly when needed. Someone to praise me and talk to me as if I am the sweetest thing they have ever seen and to take me to the doctor when I need my vaccinations. And someone to give me a treat now and again.
Oh shit, when the kids put us in the old folks home, all those dreams will come true!
I've been trying to take the dogs out for a walk every day, rarely do I do it every day, but I am trying. They now understand that when I walk out to the yard with the leashes it is time to get some exercise and they are excited. I used to struggle to get the leash on them because they would not sit still long enough for me to get it clipped on their collar. But now they know they have to sit for me if they want to walk. You really can teach old dogs new tricks!
Today was a beautiful day, in the 60's, no wind, sunny and clear, perfect day for a walk with the dogs. We head out, as usual they are pulling me along in the beginning, noses to the ground, stopping to take care of bodily functions along the way. As we go along I talk to them (I know that's a shock), and it occurs to me how nice it would be to have someone to walk me so that I get exercise, someone to feed me just the right amount of food with the right nutrients, someone to give me my vitamins and other medications just exactly when needed. Someone to praise me and talk to me as if I am the sweetest thing they have ever seen and to take me to the doctor when I need my vaccinations. And someone to give me a treat now and again.
Oh shit, when the kids put us in the old folks home, all those dreams will come true!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Cold, Steam, Bells
It's been awhile since I wrote and this one has been bouncing around in my head for some time. As most know we had a cold spell here that had the masses of the Dallas Fort Worth area completely baffled. The small little quaint town of Granbury was no exception. Eight, Nine, Ten, degrees is just a little too cold here. Interestingly enough there was not a lot of moisture in this storm which is always a nice thing.
I, of course, will not allow a little cold to ruin my run. This fine morning it was 18, not bad really. I wait until it's closer to 21 and head out. I love the crisp cold mornings, I feel refreshed even though I cannot move my mouth because it's frozen. It's interesting, I've run in this temperature in New Mexico and Colorado many times and yet here it feels so cold, they tell me it's because of the humidity we suffer.
In any case the run was a normal run, nothing very unusual, and then I take a turn down toward the boardwalk at the lake. The sun was just coming up to the point that the few clouds were bright orange and pink with the rays of the sun peaking through. As I run toward the water I see that there is steam coming off of the water rising soflty and creating a fog that just hovers over the water's surface, the fog and water are reflecting the orange and pink hues of the sunrise. It's breathtaking. As I am taking this all in I hear the bells from a nearby church playing Clair de Lun. Although they are located on the other side of the lake the water carries the music to me through the fog and the color of the sunrise. My senses are overwhelmed and I must stop to take it all in. Here in this little town the beauty is there waiting for us to take notice. God really paints a beautiful picture.
I, of course, will not allow a little cold to ruin my run. This fine morning it was 18, not bad really. I wait until it's closer to 21 and head out. I love the crisp cold mornings, I feel refreshed even though I cannot move my mouth because it's frozen. It's interesting, I've run in this temperature in New Mexico and Colorado many times and yet here it feels so cold, they tell me it's because of the humidity we suffer.
In any case the run was a normal run, nothing very unusual, and then I take a turn down toward the boardwalk at the lake. The sun was just coming up to the point that the few clouds were bright orange and pink with the rays of the sun peaking through. As I run toward the water I see that there is steam coming off of the water rising soflty and creating a fog that just hovers over the water's surface, the fog and water are reflecting the orange and pink hues of the sunrise. It's breathtaking. As I am taking this all in I hear the bells from a nearby church playing Clair de Lun. Although they are located on the other side of the lake the water carries the music to me through the fog and the color of the sunrise. My senses are overwhelmed and I must stop to take it all in. Here in this little town the beauty is there waiting for us to take notice. God really paints a beautiful picture.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Nostalgia
The week between Christmas and the New Year was spent in New Mexico with our families. Before we arrived they received quite a bit of snow "like the old days" according to my friends and family there. It snowed twice while we were there, beautiful soft, quiet snows. Being there with that kind of snow coming down I feel nostalgic.
It did make it hard to run. The first day I needed to run I was able to do so on some roads rarely travled and somewhat clear of ice and snow. But the second day my plan called for running was after the last large snow fall and was a bit more difficult.
I started out on the walking/biking path that circles a golf course. I thought that perhaps they would have plowed the path, alas I was incorrect! The path had been used despite the ice under the snow but it only made it packed with hard little balls of snow and ice. This hurt my feet terribly! And so I ran 3 miles on this surface. This path happens to be very close to the neighborhood I grew up in so I made the decision to take off for my old house and see what the neighborhood looks like now. Of course the roads are not main roads and so they too had not been plowed but were also packed from traffic and made it a bit easier to run.
As I came up on the house of my childhood the nostalgia flooded through me. I remember those days of climbing trees, riding horses over the hills, spying on the adults from my perch high up, days sleeping in the yard under the willow tree, the endless hours I spent outside in that yard and in the forest next door. Of course it has changed so much, there is no more forest as the houses have sprung up and that makes me sad.
I circle around the street to where my grandparents house was and there it stands. It doesn't look much different. Again the feeling is overwhelming, joy, sadness, wonder. There was a small forest group of lots between our house and theirs with a path we had beaten into the dirt from going back and forth. Now houses sit right in the middle. I remember going back and forth in the dark and being sure some kind of scary creature was going to jump out from behind the trees to eat me alive. I remember the signal my grandmother gave for when we were not allowed to come over, typically when she and her friends were playing bridge and having cocktails! If the curtains were pulled she was entertaining, if they were open we were to come on over.
After stopping for a bit I go on around the area, running on the streets where I used to ride bikes for hours on end, up and down the hills with no thought of fear of traffic or of someone snatching me. From morning until way after dark we would ride and explore the series of streets.
Sometimes I wonder if nostalgia is a bad thing, for me it always leads to a series of "what if" questions. This day the questions centered around my parents. "What if they had not moved from this house while I was in college", "Would they have stayed together?". "What if they had not divorced?" "If they had not what would they be like as grandparents together?" "What would our holiday be like if they had toughed it out? Would it be happy and fun or sad and tense?" "How would my relationship with Terry and my children be different had they stayed together?" See, the house where I grew up symbolizes the good times in my family, it was after they moved that it fell apart. I was already married when they divorced and sometimes I feel I've never had the opportunity to really grieve over the loss. When I go by our home the sense of sadness is overwhelming, yet it's good to remember the love that was there and the fun we had together before things turned in the wrong direction. We really cannot go back can we? Only forward. For me that means making my marriage and my relationship with my children happy, loving, trustworthy, and lasting.
What does all of this have to do with running? Well running allows these thoughts to ebb in and out of my head, it allows my heart to hurt and to be lite, it allows the feelings to flood in without someone there to see the affect it has on me.
And so for the New Year my resolution is to make this year with my family the very best year we've had so far in our time together. We will be adding two to our lives this year as our children get married. I want them to remember us as a happy loving family.
Happy New Year
It did make it hard to run. The first day I needed to run I was able to do so on some roads rarely travled and somewhat clear of ice and snow. But the second day my plan called for running was after the last large snow fall and was a bit more difficult.
I started out on the walking/biking path that circles a golf course. I thought that perhaps they would have plowed the path, alas I was incorrect! The path had been used despite the ice under the snow but it only made it packed with hard little balls of snow and ice. This hurt my feet terribly! And so I ran 3 miles on this surface. This path happens to be very close to the neighborhood I grew up in so I made the decision to take off for my old house and see what the neighborhood looks like now. Of course the roads are not main roads and so they too had not been plowed but were also packed from traffic and made it a bit easier to run.
As I came up on the house of my childhood the nostalgia flooded through me. I remember those days of climbing trees, riding horses over the hills, spying on the adults from my perch high up, days sleeping in the yard under the willow tree, the endless hours I spent outside in that yard and in the forest next door. Of course it has changed so much, there is no more forest as the houses have sprung up and that makes me sad.
I circle around the street to where my grandparents house was and there it stands. It doesn't look much different. Again the feeling is overwhelming, joy, sadness, wonder. There was a small forest group of lots between our house and theirs with a path we had beaten into the dirt from going back and forth. Now houses sit right in the middle. I remember going back and forth in the dark and being sure some kind of scary creature was going to jump out from behind the trees to eat me alive. I remember the signal my grandmother gave for when we were not allowed to come over, typically when she and her friends were playing bridge and having cocktails! If the curtains were pulled she was entertaining, if they were open we were to come on over.
After stopping for a bit I go on around the area, running on the streets where I used to ride bikes for hours on end, up and down the hills with no thought of fear of traffic or of someone snatching me. From morning until way after dark we would ride and explore the series of streets.
Sometimes I wonder if nostalgia is a bad thing, for me it always leads to a series of "what if" questions. This day the questions centered around my parents. "What if they had not moved from this house while I was in college", "Would they have stayed together?". "What if they had not divorced?" "If they had not what would they be like as grandparents together?" "What would our holiday be like if they had toughed it out? Would it be happy and fun or sad and tense?" "How would my relationship with Terry and my children be different had they stayed together?" See, the house where I grew up symbolizes the good times in my family, it was after they moved that it fell apart. I was already married when they divorced and sometimes I feel I've never had the opportunity to really grieve over the loss. When I go by our home the sense of sadness is overwhelming, yet it's good to remember the love that was there and the fun we had together before things turned in the wrong direction. We really cannot go back can we? Only forward. For me that means making my marriage and my relationship with my children happy, loving, trustworthy, and lasting.
What does all of this have to do with running? Well running allows these thoughts to ebb in and out of my head, it allows my heart to hurt and to be lite, it allows the feelings to flood in without someone there to see the affect it has on me.
And so for the New Year my resolution is to make this year with my family the very best year we've had so far in our time together. We will be adding two to our lives this year as our children get married. I want them to remember us as a happy loving family.
Happy New Year
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